In many ways, every relationship is a mirror. How I feel towards the other person and what I see in them is often an indicator of how I see and feel towards myself. My relationships reflect back to me those areas where I am not loving myself enough. If I allow someone to treat me a particular way, it is only because part of me is already treating myself that way. Otherwise, why would I accept it from them?
Have you every met anyone who truly loves herself yet is still able to be critical of others?
Every criticism or trigger shows me how severely I criticize myself. If it bothers me to watch another person be inauthentic or put on a show rather than be fully present and true, it's usually an indication that - in some form or another - I do the very same. Otherwise, why would it bother me so? How is it possible to despise in another what I accept within myself?
One simple way to put it is this: No one can push my buttons unless I have the buttons to push.
Again, every relationship is a mirror - a mirror for the relationship I have with myself.
Relationships provide me with the opportunity to uncover aspects of "me" that I didn't know I had hidden from myself: ways in which I'd been living inauthentically, giving my power over to another, devaluing my role and my desires in the relationship, judging my emotional reactions as unworthy or inaccurate - despite how insistently they were hammering against my heart.
Therefore, the purpose of a relationship is not for me to see them or them to see me - it is for me to see me.If I am too busy seeing them, I am not seeing me. And I am the only one truly in a relationship here.... with myself.
Again, Conversations with God speaks to this: "The highest choice is that which produces the highest good for you.... and the highest good for you becomes the highest good for another.... What you do for your Self, you do for another. What you do for another, you do for the Self. This is because you and the other are one. And this is because.... There is naught but You."
There is naught but me.
Therefore, as I listen to, trust, and love myself - and take those actions that are most loving towards me - only then can I truly love another. For now I truly love myself.
Have you every met anyone who truly loves herself yet is still able to be critical of others?
Every criticism or trigger shows me how severely I criticize myself. If it bothers me to watch another person be inauthentic or put on a show rather than be fully present and true, it's usually an indication that - in some form or another - I do the very same. Otherwise, why would it bother me so? How is it possible to despise in another what I accept within myself?
One simple way to put it is this: No one can push my buttons unless I have the buttons to push.
Again, every relationship is a mirror - a mirror for the relationship I have with myself.
Relationships provide me with the opportunity to uncover aspects of "me" that I didn't know I had hidden from myself: ways in which I'd been living inauthentically, giving my power over to another, devaluing my role and my desires in the relationship, judging my emotional reactions as unworthy or inaccurate - despite how insistently they were hammering against my heart.
Therefore, the purpose of a relationship is not for me to see them or them to see me - it is for me to see me.If I am too busy seeing them, I am not seeing me. And I am the only one truly in a relationship here.... with myself.
Again, Conversations with God speaks to this: "The highest choice is that which produces the highest good for you.... and the highest good for you becomes the highest good for another.... What you do for your Self, you do for another. What you do for another, you do for the Self. This is because you and the other are one. And this is because.... There is naught but You."
There is naught but me.
Therefore, as I listen to, trust, and love myself - and take those actions that are most loving towards me - only then can I truly love another. For now I truly love myself.
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